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Online Dating:
Advice
Why
Try Internet Dating?
Internet
personals still have that stigma as being a haven for
losers, geeks, and perverts, and that no one normal
would ever look to the internet for friendship or romance.
Let me tell you, it's not true!
Let's
talk about "real life" dating... Once you're
past the "college age," you have a total of
four places to meet singles:
Through
Friends
At Work
At Nightclub/Bars
In "Everyday Life"
Friends
- We're a pretty tight circle, so we already know all
the same people! But let's just say your friends do
manage to set you up on a date. What a great way to
find out what your friends really think of you! Then,
what happens if things go wrong? It could possibly cause
a major rift in your friendship.
Co-Workers
- Well... maybe if you work for a really really big
company, but most companies frown on inner-office romances.
Personally, I don't want my co-workers knowing every
facet of my life. And, as with dating through friends,
what happens when it ends? You're stuck dealing with
this person day after day after day.
Nightclubs/Bars
- Yeah, I love going out, catching a band, grabbing
a few drinks, but let's take a closer look at what's
often called The Bar Scene: For starters, most clubs
are packed with baby-faced 21 year olds. I swear, it's
like Fetus Night Out sometimes! While I'm not much older
than these boys, and there's enough Mrs. Robinson in
me to appreciate the eye candy, I just don't have much
in common with people whose only objective is to get
drunk and get laid.
Another
thing, guys are chickens at clubs! It's worse than a
high-school dance: All the guys on one side of the room,
all the girls on the other. I don't know how many times
a guy would be giving me the eye, and not sat a word
until either a) closing or b) I'd approach him. And
don't give me that bull about "fearing rejection"
either! When someone makes eye contact and smiles at
you, that's a pretty clear indication that it's safe
to say "HI" to her!!!
Everyday
Life - Perhaps some people like leaving things to chance,
and hope that someday the person of your dreams will
just waltz into your life, but I prefer to make my life
happen rather than wait for it to happen. And I don't
want someone hitting on me when I'm at the Wal-mart
buying tampons.
Another
problem with just "bumping into" someone,
which also applies to bars & clubs... You don't
know the status of the other person. They might be married,
they might just be out for a Guy's Night Out. They might
be so intoxicated they don't know what's going on.
Then
there's the actual men themselves. Guys in their 30s
who live with Mom, guys in Stone Cold Steve Austin talking
t-shirts, and guys like my sister's "friend"
The Tongue, who wanted to get laid, that night, and
that's all. Since my sis didn't "put out"
the guy didn't call her back. No big loss. When she
ran into him a week or so later, this slimeball actually
had the nerve to say, "I didn't call you cuz I
don't want a relationship." Who the hell said ANYTHING
about a relationship? So, then there's the internet....
The
internet might be a haven for losers, geeks, and perverts,
but so is the real world!
A
few benefits of meeting online...
- You
get to know people who share your interests, values,
and goals.
- You
know whether or not they are literate -- at least
they are smart enough to operate a computer!
- You
know they are looking for some kind of relationship.
- There's
no swapping of personal information until you're comfortable
with it.
- If
you get too many warning signs, you can call it off
and apply mailblock.
- You
get to meet people you otherwise might not have met
-- you're not limited to those in your zip code who
happen to go to the same places you go.
- You
don't have to be "smooth" - you have every
advantage to make a great first impression; you have
time, backspace, and spellcheck on your side.
- No
rush - take your time before going out with someone.
- You
can have a great time without having to worry about
if your hair is a mess, if your place smells like
litter box, or that your typing wearing just your
underwear.
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